American Apparel: Let Your Fingers Do the Talking

The marketing mavens at American Apparel, that Los Angeles company known for its blank T-shirts and eye-catching print ads, have come up with six new colors for the company's line of nail polish launched not that long ago.

My favorite is the one called "California Trooper," a khaki shade supposedly reminiscient of the ubiquitious California Highway Patrol officers who glide up and down the state's freeways. Frankly, I don't think "California Trooper" is going to be a hot seller, at least not after my morning today in traffic court.

My ticket was issued by a California trooperette who cited me for talking on a cell phone while whizzing down the San Diego Freeway. Supposedly it's a mere $20 fine, but when you tack on the court fees and penalty assessments (extra fees to help out with the state's budget problem) it came to $142! That's considered cheap by traffic-ticket standards. Cross those double-yellow lines on the freeway and expect to cough up more than $430.

So could I suggest another name for the new beige nail polish sold at American Apparel stores? Perhaps something like Carmel by the Sea. I think it could be a much better seller.